When I was pregnant with my first child I insisted on purchasing many, many pregnancy books. I wanted to soak up all the information out there on how to be pregnant, have a baby, and raise one. I thought that the more knowledge I had the better parent I would be. I believed if I fully understood what was happening that would make me a parent. If anyone wants to join me in being transparent, none of us understands fully what we are doing regardless of how many baby books we’ve read.
Our faith often takes a dive when we are hitting a challenge. I had this bible study I was trying to complete, it helped my faith grow. But there where times I would read and think I just don’t understand. Maybe this bible stuff is to hard for me to comprehend, I’d blame my education and I would question my own faith. The biggest concern drew when this question played in my head “How can I fully believe God and claim to be a Christian when I don’t fully understand Him?” I was shaken, I thought because I wasn’t smart enough to grasp God’s whole picture that my faith wasn’t secure.
I can loosen that thought up by comparing it to parenting. When I went into labor 3 months early, most everyone was saying that it wasn’t labor. That perhaps it was Braxton hicks, maybe I just needed rest. But somehow even not fully understanding what was happening medically, I knew enough to get myself to a hospital. During all of my baby book reading not everything stuck, I can’t remember much from it now looking back, but enough stuck for me to take the correct steps to save my baby’s life.
When I read my bible, my mind will wander, I’ll get confused, or not fully comphend what is going on. But I keep reading, I want to know as much as I can about God, I trust Him to guide my reading and give me comprehension where I am lacking. I may not know the Bible in it’s full when I pass away, but I want to know I pursued God whole-heartily and trusted His Holy Spirit to do the rest.
One thing my mind pieced together was if I could somehow fully understand God, that would make Him a small god. If my uneducated, distracted flesh body could fully understand the creator of the world it would take away from His character. So I rest in knowing that I’m serving a God who I can never fully comprehend in this life, because He is to big of a God for my mind to grasp. And I can delight in that knowledge and keep pursuing Him trusting the right information, life saving information will stick and be shared with others.
Mama of Blessings 
So agree with this. So many times I get frustrated that I’m getting nothing out of the word. That I can’t feel where to go. That I can’t find the proper scripture, am I truly a Chris Follower if I can’t even stay in my bible. Like you I have come to the same realization that I’m not supposed to know it all. I was not created to be able to understand on my own. I was created to Glorify God, and let me tell you sister. We surly Glorify God when he revils just the smallest amount of knowledge to us. We get all excited, shouting his name singing and praising. All for knowing just the smallest bits of an unending God. From everlasting to everlasting! I do feel like that why we will be with God for eternity once Jesus returns, because it will take eternity to learn our Father. Thank you so much for writing and taking the time to compose such wonderful works. So proud and thankful for you.
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He is s big God we serve that is for sure! I just love the way you put that Amanda!
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